Poetry, Fragments, etc

Poem 03.09.2021

We are

Bodies of water

At rest and in motion


In sound often the

Same, sometimes different

In footfalls on textures


White as snow

Dark as tarmac


Slipping on wet leaves

From last autumn


In motion and at rest

A body of water

A state of constant flux

Equal to the idea of decay



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Poem 01.21.2021

The Quiet in silence
is less than complete.

There is a tone in the dark.

Distance matches sound.
Shadows move based on objects.

Stillness is the quiet of
an internal vibration.

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Poem 01.19.2021

Puzzles have pieces, discovered by seams
We use wood to find water in underground streams
We have brief memories and moments of dreams
We scrub to be clean until we're red in the face
we race for a cure until we're blue in the face
Gather for parades only to stand stagnant in place

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Poem 11.16.2020 (bit of a laugh)

A tiger's tail
quick as an elephant's trunk

Drinking from a boat
that has already sunk

Thirst is a tide that
dust will swallow first

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Poem 10.18.2020

An uninterrupted room.


A place for shadows at night.


The windows age differently than the walls.




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Poem 09.25.2020

Smell of rain-

Composite-

Fracture of light-

Atmosphere,

Weight lifted.


Autumn drains-

Multiple directions-

Fracture of water-

Terrain,

Bent for tomorrow.



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Poem 09.20.2020

The scale of things, being equal, rarely accounts for it

The feeling watching air move from stillness to rustle

Which can only be registered as it moves from tree to tree

Putting one to rest, setting one to flutter, to imitate the shape of air





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Poem 08.26.2020

Transportation by slow devices


Lattices of nerve endings climbed


My feet feel flat on the ground that I know is curved


The sun falling is us turning rather


Another slow device


Having grown darker, having grown quieter


I realize I have been ignoring the buzz in my ears






Poem 08.24.2020

The silence between words stops.


The words stop.


There is a long distance, and a short time


There are blinds, and the blind.


The floor tiles are in sequence. The silence stops in sequence.


Between the words that have stopped.


For a short time we are held in silence.


The sequence of silence starts.


The words start. In a short time between silence.


Silence is a word that starts a sequence.


Muttering through a held breath. Shadows on floor tiles.


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In 2014 I was asked by my friend Dave Sullivan to contribute a spoken word piece to an album on which he was working. At that time he knew he would be moving away from Portland, and wanted to work with friends and musicians on a musical collaboration before he left. He gave a loose idea of the project and the title he had in mind, The Lodge, I wrote the following piece and recorded it at his house in a couple of takes. His album was released under the name "Lodge club" in 2016 by Braxeling Records. In 2017 he returned for a visit, and having planned ahead, performed the album in full at a local bar. I am happy to say that I was able to be a part of the performance, which is the only time I have appeared on stage.







Poem (August 14th 2020)


I am at a lake house, as a child.


As the same child, I am digging for worms in a grassy backyard.


The sun goes down when I am slightly older, I eat an ice cream cone


I move forward with my hands in my pockets. There is a voice that tells me not to do so.


More agile now I climb on and around the remains of a fallen oak tree.


There are gaps. I am always walking. An ocean shoreline is on my right.


I am at a lake house, as a young adult. On a dock watching the water lap at the shore.


I move forward swinging my arms at my sides. With fewer teeth, with strained eyesight. The sun rises. The sun sets. Ice cream melts. Trees stand. Trees fall. Worms burrow. Rivers feed lakes. Rivers feed oceans. There are gaps. I kicked a can, over and over, until it stood upright.


Poem (August 9th 2020)


Darkness shines


In that moment I ask that the phone be disconnected


Asking will not make it so


I don’t dream a wish, but wish for a dream


Edge of an eyelid closing


Itch as restless


Weight is a breath held by gravity


You can move your fingers in piano motions, those songs are alone


Memory we say when we mean agility


Itch as restless


Edge of an eyelid brushes an idea


Wish for a dream that is waking, waking does not make it so


Test pattern landscape


Darkness shines


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Fragments 2012-2019


2012

Stacking up disfigurines
A minor interior

2012

Crushing flashcubes with our hands
To see stars on our fingers

2012

There are times when I glide
Over aspects of ice and fallen leaves
Past dog walking young mothers
Dressed thick for the weather
And a hint of sunshine there behind me
I glide across my own shadow
On aspects of ice and fallen leaves


2013

The hwy drowns everything
The ambient noise a wave
A crush made louder in my headphones where
It is trapped
Eno strategic guitars lost in the mire
No feelies no vu..

2013

I am a witness to
Chimney apertures

While the air is cool and
Relatively quiet

2013

I appear
A ghost in a reflected surface

An ever more distinct shadow
In brighter growing light

Head, barely formed shoulder,
Incomplete but present

2013

Feels like I am gliding at waist level over a shadow of myself

2013

I love to exhale
Up onto the clear stars
On an autumn morning

2013

I am a statue with teeth.
I am a statue that speaks.
I move as the wheels move
Under me.
The quiet is mine.
The movement is still. The
Movement is fine.
I am a statue that peeks


2013

Every month rain must fall

Wiping away that which I reflect of you

Each puddle a promise
Each ripple a certainty


2013

Yellow of the marsh grass
In the long sunlight setting,
A face neutral in expression.

2014

Days of cold
each day less significant then the next
Chitter of leaves on the crisp lawn
Where a boot might break heel
A step is just a step in line with my foreseeable breathing

2015

Growing up in a rural area
I would often walk at night
Distant light of stars overhead

Ribbons of narrow roads that rolled over hills and made way around creeks cut lines in the canopy of oak tree branches

I would walk
Head up following the gap in the trees 
The distant light of stars being too dim too diffused for observation

Lead by the stars. With a mix tape playing in my ears


2015
Past events have weight to them that no current event can match.
It is not only nostalgia in which they are steeped, it is context. Context and the underlying string and contact of other seemingly unrelated occurrences that add gravitas to each past event.
Different so for everyone with different contextual webs bringing us to the surface of present tense.

2015

It rained last night 
And the smell left behind
Is not one of clean air
But of dirt disturbed 
Raindrops have popped apart on
The surface of dry earth and penetrated
Beneath and within
A spoon stirred then tossed like a stick for a game of fetch
No one act distinguishes the other 

2016

Time is a tricky thing.
By that of course I mean the measure of time
Passing as it does or does not
As we view it, taste it, wrestle with it
And turn on and off things atomic

I was never one to dwell on what might be
What might happen in the future
Making plans with my eggs in different baskets
And now I find after personal acts that have in effect destroyed my physical connection to the past
I have no future
Or what might be described as an ever moving forward omnipresent "now"
For which I can only be present 

Like gravity, constant, never telling 

2016

Look at an object

See it for the first time

Not to discern it's qualities

As such but to see yourself
Looking at an object

Out of body...

2016

Leaves in the wind
Mice without reign

One pink slipper 
A bit of syringe 

The various free papers in small piles
Angled by the wind corridor 

2016

The pressure of field
Optical illusion 
Trees off far
A man before them 
Horizon dips or the man comes closer or 
Walks away 
The man is gone. No shoulders or head
Now only pale trees at a distance

2016

The quiet world is never silent
In the dark before dawn
The globe dips as a sailing ship to one side
An under murmuring of scratching ant limbs & moth wings stretched
At near six feet high the light breeze has a sense of movement and no sound
At Ground level no engine can make the natural world

2016

Breath
So much
So many that
It drips 
Condenses in a fall
As I imagine an injured bat must
Fall as dusk darkens
Deepens it's stain on the yard
Breath settles colder than
When exhaled in the portioned
Train floorboards
Others step aboard
Often the train stops at a vacant station
I settle back
Spine, torso, face
I settle in

2016
Effort 
Ugh
More like the thought of effort
Walking 
There is, a ghost in
My sack of bones

2016

I question the name of things.
I question the reason for the names of things.
I question the name of broken things.

I have a red book. A list of names.
I have a blue book. A list of opposite names.

I have a yellow book of empty pages. A list of names for broken things.

The names remain. Although function has finished.

2016

Vacation ends, routine begins

Reality numb and torso first

This is where I find myself, over there

2016

Catches the eye 
Something that dances left
So alive
Just caught in bits of breeze
That tests dust and discarded fabric

2016

4 am ghosts

In the still dark of possible
Rodent death

Between cardboard boxes on the curb
And diffused street light favoring leafy shodows, post fractal design

Footfalls mote motion than sound

2016

Too often the absence 
Of our actions is inconceivable.
Too often we step forth
Not knowing,what we might do 
If we accepted the thought of not walking.
The stand still. Lessening one thread of universal vibration. One less voice from the bottom of the well.

2016

Light plays tricks
Travels along distance 
Heads
The underside of foggy wet
Power lines
Structure
From source to sight

2016

Memory can be a prison. It makes one separate from younger and younger generations who co exist with me but have completely different life experiences. 
I have a pre internet viewpoint. Pre google, pre Starbucks...
I dialed a rotary phone to call someone. I used the number one to dial long distance. I remember when area codes signified the state in which the person who owned that phone number resided.
I remember buying records based on cover credits.  Who produced the record. Or based on a band I liked, their stated influences and likes.
These were times when certain records were badges of honor and possessing them meant you were in the know.  Coming across another person that had that same record was remarkable and worthy of starting a friendship.
When you met someone who knew about the records by the band Big Star, you wanted to get to know that person. Prior to 1983 or 1984 Big Star was like a family secret. Something treasured but kept quiet. 
Chance sometimes brought fellow listeners together.  I have life long friends, people I have known for over thirty years, and we met over nothing so much as a love music, and the occasional beer.

2016

I face the wind
And it is like I am a hollow of air
Open mouthed drawing in the rush
That escapes through every pore
The length of my body
With every step i take moving forward defying gravity,
Just a little bit

2016

In the smoky air
Security lights stretched
Too thin over hard pavement
No one, just dry leaves in the wind

2016

I find delight in the light
That changed in the wind

2016

A life lived or bogged down in the details 

2016

Sun dried here hours ago
Hours here dried a sun ago
Here hours a sun dried
Hours ago a sun dried here 

2016

Railway debris
Leaves caught on ties
Cigarette filters
Some form of cotton ball
Various types of fast food plastic
Compounded together gathered by wind
And rain, decaying at different rates,  forming
A cement of sorts next to the track

2016

Extremities in extreme weather
Fingers and bits of noses and toes

The moisture is drawn to the surface
And scalped by the passing wind
The moisture is a thing made clean

Leaving one with dead feeling digits
And noses, cold burnt skin cells waiting to
Be pushed off in the dust and debris
That eventually is cornered

The corner is a thing to be made clean

2017

Below freezing 
The distance between power lines
Is a visible fabric 
Of charged air 

2017

People I view with suspicion 

Those with a short distance between
Thigh and knee, who can fit between seat
And barrier on a train 

Those with legs so short their feet swing
When seated

2017

Between the dark of
Street lights
A train window slides
On a train with passengers
Glints of light on teeth, phones,
Jacket buttons zippers
Stray overlong Christmas lights
Outside
Feels like there is bottle glass
On the house angles under rooftops
And side walls

2017

Sound
Is just noise
In the air

2017

Dark is night
And ever so shall
Remain

No sword of eyes
Will be taken from
The sheath

2017

When you meet someone, someone new, you generally do your best to make a good impression. So that after you have  parted that person is left with what amounts to a better version of you. Like a king tubby dub track with some parts removed to emphasis what remains.
Meeting these people again, confronted by their impression of me, I find myself wanting to be that impression, that better person they see and seem to know.
Over a lifetime, doing this so many times, it is difficult to the point of near impossibility to be myself, to find myself, among the shards and shapes of good impressions I have left.
My inner voice speaks to a shadow of myself, going dim and more dim as light fades behind a cloud of self doubt. Until such time, it feels as though there is nothing but words bouncing along and back the inner walls of my skull cavity.

2017

Clouds often look tall
Like a wall at the horizon

This does not take into account
The curve of the earth

The flat sense of the wind
And that objects are closer than
They appear

2017

Not just a memory of being in a desert town

My memory of being in a desert town

Sun long stretching the shadows of buildings
To the other side of street

Air tasting as if it had already been exhaled twice before

Each movement every footstep heard for miles in the quiet

You may well be the tree as it falls

2017

The full moon
Showing borrowed light 

Shining the same over new York City
Omaha, denver, as portland

Time difference and atmospheric 
Conditions changing
Color and texture

Nothing revealed
Save for this is
Where we are

2017

Sunrisen light
On eastern facing leaves
Above my height

2017

Moist smell in the air
Of earth turned
I settle my feet for 
A moment on the 
Curve a universe makes

2017

There are twelve notes.
The scale of it is beyond me.
There are twelve steps.
There are bakers dozens.
There are twelve rings.
There are twelve children.
And twelve more. And twelve more.
The Scale of it is beyond me.
There are ten fingers, for twelve notes.
There is music.

2017

Lens flare off streetlights 
Stabbing straight lines
Squinting I can see feathery curves
A reflection of my eyelash
And lines of movement the
False evidence of moisture in
The air that smells wet with
Summer yesterday's  evaporation

2017

I select
The path of least destruction 

The one that avoids the
Most fallen fruit 

2017

I have cut ties
With the wrists of my
Past actions

Once a suicide plunge 
Now just the hope of hitting the bottom 

One spins
The other reels

Never too late to to not decide

2017

Trees
Buses
Tables
Chairs
Lakes
Buildings
Cardboard
People
Candles 
Flags
Irregular stones
Metal
Tin siding
Corkscrews
Formica
Coffee cups
Railroad ties
Traffic signs
Blood as it drips from a cut in the skin
Sandwich bags
Pencil lead
A smell on the breeze
Record albums
Concrete dust
Water 
Eyeglass lenses
Pharmaceutical pills
Cash registers 
Ice picks
Rusted shovels in the dark corner of a shed

It's all just a con-flux of atoms

2017

I am a time traveler

a sleepless drifter in my own
Life
My own body

Each blink of the eye
Now coupled with heavy drifts

My legs are hollow and do not welcome 
The thought of grain storage 

Train windows flutter past fence posts
Interior light on curtained windows
In a stop motion film that later is
A memory

2017

Five birds flying
Vaguely north against
A dwindling blue sky

2017

Some days buoyant.
The wait for gravity
To come to grips
Extended it seems, as an
Unlikely song hums in my
Head, down the length of
My limbs, disturbing my fingers and toes.
Delightfully.

2017

The Grace that is light
Is shown at best in the gap
Between shadows as they 
Move with no effort on the wall
Across the room

2018

From daylight to daylight
I am a string
Stretching between invisible cans

2018

On a train
On the descending portion of a bridge 
Facing away from the direction of the train's progress
Looking down as the ground slowly but clearly becomes closer
The sense of falling nauseates me

2018

tomorrow came and went, leaving me here, up the stairs and down the stairs in a strange house

2018

The world is shaped by wind.

The flat spiral of a tree does not dance because the air has been carved out around it. It is in an eye of creation. 

One speck of sand can be sent forth until it disappears. Speed dissolves time.

2018

I do not have dreams. Not sleeping dreams. I have imaginings. Ruminations. Ideas. Daydreams. Slight blackouts and a memory. Consequently little feels real to me. Looking at a river from a train as I ride over, the river moves different than I would think. Than I might dream. The words do not fit what I see. What I see is not what is spoken aloud in my head. Not that I hear the words. I do not. They are written out, as on a blackboard. I am just reading them to myself. In other voices. Not spoken. Often merely phrases I remember. I remember my grandfather telling me not to walk with my hands in my pockets. I was four. I hear him tell me that again for perhaps the millionth time. I am fifty five. I do not hear him. But the words are there. I dream in the day. I am drawn in the direction of the words while I don't sleep.

2018

Cold on the surface
Cold to the touch
Air fuses headlights to vapor
And nothing can be seen
Outside of a short distance

2018

I live between leaves turning color
And leaves falling.
Lost time never counts. 

2018

The shape of air
Is partially exposed by
The way it touches trees

The curve of its bite
The heel of its hand
The rate of wind to breeze 

2018

Glistening gray
Is what remains of rain

Pooling in low spots
That have discernible order

Pieces of broken mirrors left
Where they fell for luck, good and bad.

2019

Negative space.
The space between buildings. That hint of sky.
The space between fixed glares. Casual thought behind eyes.
The space between intellect and indifference.  
I stare into negative space. Pour myself through with momentum from my eyes.

2019

Wish these lights would
Go quiet so i could see
The delicate blue of dawning

2019

Sun rises
And lights the tops 
Of trees

Infusing the upper branches
With different shadows

2019

The natural beauty of
Everything is so
Common that it
Largely goes unnoticed 

2019

Sunlight clears the horizon
And under lights the bottoms 
Of leaves

Shadow segments in the light
Are cut into the same shapes as their
Objects 

2019

Single Leaves vibrating an autumn song
On otherwise bare branches

2019

Fog and smoke
Indiscernible in dark tree
Branches obscuring my
Vision to the same degree 


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 In 1995 I gave to my wife to be a handwritten book consisting of a selection of poems I had written. I entitled this book "Dissolved by water". Here are some of the poems from that book.


Ghost houses on

postal routes

the clatter of gates

not moving about

---------------------------------------------

Adam says "mistakes grow on trees"

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Did you see me

in the heat disfigures

avoiding the cracks

calling out your nicknames

-------------------------------------------------------

Crushed out, thrown

aluminum foil that made us

stars, time again to

leave children smiling, 

it's not as easy as just remembering, as I

remember it.

Move and we'll dodge the wind.

Coat up and play kite.

A film closing out eyes.

Candy cigarettes make you blind.

One long hair behind your palm.

Crushed out thrown, 

together and away, as I remember it.

--------------------------------------------------

You look at the ocean

It's all marble

--------------------------------------------------

There are simple tricks

I can perform.

Watching a tree. air

running over my teeth.


------------------------------------------------

The sun

lights half of

the curve of my arm

-----------------------------------------------

The air smell tepid-

like moist residue

on tin foil.

-----------------------------------------------

Seeing them in

Ike jackets-

I smell cigarettes.

---------------------------------------------

Down half moon

or on the way

Passing this century

in another silent view

the closer we approach

the further the shadow

straying from the sun

-----------------------------------------------

rain

like so many things

is more evident

in what it leaves behind

-------------------------------------------------

in live situations

the melody of things

is often lost in the 

rush of anticipation

-------------------------------------------

A unison of parts

suspected in motion

witnessed at six becoming seven.

Dice rolling buses

on a straight line

----------------------------------

I have nothing better to do

then toss a line over my toes

and sever them one to ten

--------------------------------------

Gravel tossed to the

sides of streets...

We may as well be

scattering ovens

--------------------------------

Already illusion, with

double glass-

porch lights passed by-

A floating bad taste

of toothache and tinfoil,

------------------------------------------------

"The sun touching down on the airport...

where's the miracle in that?"

------------------------------------------------

My latest compulsions

are silent-

There is no fever in

turning leaves over.

--------------------------------------------

Her eyelids had been

taken over by

polyps of varying

sizes and shapes.

---------------------------------------

Inheriting is the least of my crimes

------------------------------------------

Corruption brings us our

most popular times.

We find ease in

diversion and fault.

-----------------------------------------

"We all walk in this world, it's just that

some find the time to put on the

right shoes"

---------------------------------------

Memory is the path of least resistance

-----------------------------------------------

As it is, the 

wind appears

a hold in my 

mouth

------------------------------------------

Turns in a mirror, insisting

that it's my turn to go

---------------------------------------

I had a dream of

first birds, then the

fittings of pipes,

---------------------------------------

Belief is a miracle

unto itself.

---------------------------------------

She uses the word "hungry" like an appeal.

-----------------------------------------

Absence being the

better part of ignorance

I move through a space, a 

black mark where the sun

stands on the eye,

--------------------------------------------------

The water's depth

controls the rate

of reflection,

--------------------------------

"I enjoy the view

from the shower...

pine trees in the fog"

------------------------------

At every turn of the 

river, 

I drop a stone in

a dog's mouth.

--------------------------

Alone in a truck

a man shines a flashlight

into his ear

------------------------------

Looked, without crossing the street

---------------------------------

The summer weather 

has a vibration.

Suspended two or three

feet above the yellow grass.

I see it as clearly as

I see you beyond it.

------------------------------

Half naked, 

the cold is weightless

my feet can not find the floor

---------------------------------

Crows perching as

vultures, across the street

a sheet of glass not

hidden behind the bushes

--------------------------------

"I am an expert at

looking life-like

when the light falls

just right"

----------------------------

Weight

and counter-weight

my ankle swings out

from the floor, towards

the floor

-------------------------

Always the reaching

of two ropes

always the halves

of my hands

-----------------------

Gathering light

like leaves

in a net

My fingers are

the holes I

intended to fill

-----------------------

To what regard

is space?

"A building is mostly space"

-----------------------

You can measure the

frequency of rain by

the tree rings in

the puddles

-----------------------

The river is not a matter

of replenishment, but replacement

--------------------------

Bricks missing on

buildings in ornate

patterns

always in rows

always in rows

----------------------

I know what it isn't

when a brick falls

------------------------

What I am left with

in general terms

is a trace of beauty

something chaste

that explores my red knuckles

----------------------------

At arm's length with

actualities.

(That everything resembles it's

own molecular model)

----------------------------------

Shadows fall all

over our heels

and roll

----------------------------------

The table moves

slower than the paper,

That is why the paper

on top does not fall through

----------------------------

"
Yeah...they talk

cracks in my teeth,

but I still can't watch"

---------------------------

The dark comes early

this time of year

I make a map in my

mind of where I

might go

seeing the street as

it is, without a parade

--------------------------------

guilt can be measured

on the head of a dime

-----------------------------

Annoyed by smoke-

downhill in the wind.

Watch myself watch

the puddle at my feet

-------------------------

After the lightning

after the photographs

I lay awake

in the general afterwards

the general always

-------------------------

On second thought, I

hold my breath, keeping

to stick figures in my head

--------------------------

Downwind of your

perfume

glassy-eyed

as on the silver screen

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